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I tried to explain to a friend of mine who has never ever been poor in his life why it is that poverty is a cycle, and why it’s so difficult to escape poverty.
His response was, “just save money”. I kept trying to explain that when you are living paycheck to paycheck, there really is no saving money because most of your income is being spent on basic needs: food, shelter, clothing, transportation.
So, then he responded, “well, why can’t you just save $5 every week”. Well, a lot of poor people do try to save. I would manage to get a few hundred in my savings account, but then you get a flat tire, or you end up getting sick and missing a week of work, or you have an unexpected bill. And, that few hundred dollars suddenly disappears. I tried to explain to him that when you’re poor, unanticipated expenses can very quickly and easily blow through what little you have in your savings account and put you back at square one.
I also tried to explain that when you are that poor, you need to make purchases while you have the money. Like, if I needed a new pair of jeans and I had an extra $30 that week, I would buy myself a new pair of jeans that week because I didn’t know when I would have an extra $20 or $30 to spend. So, he countered that with, “You don’t need to buy clothes. You could have put that $30 in your savings.”
To which I responded, “Well, if it were socially acceptable to walk around without pants on, then maybe poor people could climb out of poverty, but until then, when your jeans have holes in them, or don’t fit you anymore, you need to get some new ones.”
Then it kind of clicked for him.. a little.
So, I went on to talk about the sociological aspects of poverty, like how growing up poor, or growing up as part of a marginalized demographic pushes your starting block 100 feet behind your peers.. how our educational systems are set up to fail impoverished children. The light bulb flickered, but never fully turned on.
And, then he said, “I still can’t believe you were ever on food stamps.”
Yes, my friend, poverty and I get a nice little reunion every few years. I know it intimately, which is why you should sit back, relax, and just listen.
I never understood how it was so difficult to see the realities of poverty. To me, it is sort of common sense. And, what is irksome is that poverty doesn’t always present itself as an old beat up car, and falling apart sneakers. People who grow up middle class and financially secure seem to think that poverty looks a lot like dirty children with dirty clothes, and no shoes. But, it doesn’t. It can be that, but it’s often not.
I grew up in a nice house in the suburbs, but we were poor. We were very poor for a long time, in part due to my medical issues. People assume that because we went to Catholic school, and had a nice house that we were well-off. We weren’t. My mother worked 2-3 jobs, and my parents took out loans to pay for our school tuition. My mother’s parents helped pay for some of our education, even though they were also incredibly poor. My parents sometimes struggled to put food on the table.
I never had clothes that were dirty or falling apart, but most of my clothes and shoes were hand-me-downs from my older cousins. In fact, a lot of my toys were, too.
Both of my parents grew up in poverty. My father, especially, grew up in complete and abject poverty. Their parents grew up in poverty, and so did their parents. My parents made immense sacrifices to set us up for financial success, but life always finds a way to intervene.
Personally, my health issues have been the driving factor behind my own financial issues. I have amassed thousands of dollars in medical debt. I work a job that doesn’t use my degree at all because I can work part time and still get benefits, and because I know I won’t get fired if I need to take extended absences due to my health.
So, when you say, “I still can’t believe you were ever on food stamps,” you are really saying, “I have this picture in my head of what poverty looks like, and you don’t fit that image.”
That idea we have about what poverty is supposed to look like is a big reason why people in the middle class are so content with cutting safety net programs, even though they are one medical problem, one car accident, or one lay-off away from complete financial ruin. What does poverty look like, then. How do you “just save money”, then.
poverty in the developed world doesn’t look like a refugee child with flies on their face.
it looks like a normal person in normal clothes, in a normal apartment, with their bills spread out on the kitchen table, crying.
That last sentence, bruh
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emo-sanders-sides-loving-unicorn: directorlazard: rapeculturerealities: fuckyeahifightlikeagirl: sweetsugaryshock: beben-eleben: For future reference. Thank you. For those who would ever need it. -C reblogging here because i can see this being relevant to anyone who’s ever tried to get out of an abusive relationship … Continue reading
farorescourage: silversoulwithlove: drst: gween-slayfani: cloudfreed: chubphlosion: biscuitsarenice: She Came PreparedThe Daily Politics presenter was chatting to Charlotte and Henrietta about banning unhealthy food in schools. She came for him “well maybe when you were my age you were a dumb … Continue reading
“Must have reliable transportation” = “this is how we legally discriminate against poor people who take the bus”
As someone who has held several management positions with hiring responsibility, this is true. The boss at my last job informed me before I conducted my very first I interview,
“You can’t outright ask someone if they have a car or have kids. That’s technically illegal. But you need to know because sometimes they can be deal breakers. You can just say ‘Do you have reliable transportation?’ and ‘Do you have any current circumstances that could impede you from being successful at work?’
To which the last one most people fumble and would say, “Well I have kids, so sometimes they could get sick. But that’s not often.” But then your potential employer could mark it down on your interview notes nonetheless.
I thought that maybe it was just my own employer. But now I noticed that I am asked both of these almost every time I interview for a job.
Language is very sneaky. Be careful how you answer. Corporations can be snakes.
In my businesses class my professor told us that the bus counts as reliable transportation. You do not legally have to say “I take the bus” just say “yes I do have reliable transportation” and leave it at that. Do not over share. DO NOT OVER SHARE. The second question just say no. If your kids are sick call out as if you are sick. I don’t have kids but I myself can get sick and that doesn’t hinder my ability to succeed so kids getting sick shouldn’t hinder you. When I call out I give as little info as possible. No one needs to know why you call out. They can’t ask about your “illness” because it violates HIPAA if they do. So as long as you don’t offer more info than you need to you should be okay.
I’ve never thought about it like this.
You should keep everything to yourself as much as possible including social media (which is getting harder and harder to do) the less you offer the better.
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Men are held to such low standards in relationships and it’s infuriating; just today I heard from my co-workers that ones husband never drove to come see her when they were doing long distance, and the other’s hasn’t mowed once in their 30+ years of marriage.
Like we like fun at lesbians moving fast in relationships, but that’s because women are socialized much differently than men, and those traits lead to healthier relationships. Though gender roles are fucking wack in general, you can’t deny that women are raise to be more understanding, expressive, and caring in general. My girlfriend drives 2 hours to come see me every weekend, and my friends boyfriend can barely make the 40 minute trip to come see her.
When women are in relationships with each other, they are more likely to talk about feelings, and go farther for their partners. Women do this in hetero relationships too, but it’s rarely reciprocated if they’re with a cis male.
I read an incredible essay about how gay marriage is incredibly beneficial to straight partners, because straight relationships always have a basis in inequality, due to societal gender divisions. Gay relationships show what it’s like to have a relationship without a gender based power imbalance.
Ladies, if you wouldn’t put up with it from a best friend, don’t let a boyfriend get away with it. Cultivate a society where men in relationships have to at least have basic decency; not only through your partners, but also through how you raise your sons.
I’m shamelessly rebloging myself because I think this is a very important concept that more people need to be introduced too; I hope this gains traction and shows people to think critically about how they are treated.
whenever i see a baby in public i wish i were like a powerful faerie god mother character who could give the baby a gift like “you’ll never get a cold” or “math will always make sense to you” or something like bein’ great with string instruments but I don’t have any powers that I know of but it doesn’t stop me from trying so every time I see a baby in public I tell the adult with it “what a beautiful baby” and it makes them smile and then I pretend I can take the goodness of their smile and I look at the baby and I think very hard “you will have a good life, even if it’s hard, you will end up happy” and I’m just hopin’ the magic kicks in at some point
faerie: for your service, I will grant you one boon
me: cool can it be the power to grant boons
faerie, looking through the manual: uh,
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scarlet-benoit-is-my-rolemodel:
And my weak ass elementary school got rid of our jungle gym because Ella was too weak to hang on and sprained her wrist
That is a death trap
ok fun but like… how do you stop?
I feel like this cannot possibly be the intended usage but also I can’t imagine any other possible intention for this contraption??
The person I reblogged this from is:
•Great
•Kind
•Super cool
•Lit af
•Not a bad person
•Deserves the best
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Every time I hate my body I remember that there are millions of old rich white men who benefit from my self hatred and if there’s one thing I hate, it’s old rich white men so I snap out of that shit instantly cos I ain’t EVER giving them the satisfaction.
Oh my fucKING GOD
Wait stop this is a game changer.
i have reblogged this 4 times; i have thought about this every fucking day
Reminder!
“If every woman in the world woke up tomorrow and decided that she loved herself and loved her body just the way it is, how many industries would go out of business?”
IMPORTANT
Hey look a few more industries for us millennials to kill!
This is the most motivating thing I’ve ever seen in regards to me stopping hating on my self
Don’t leave Gen Z out of the action! Give us some kills!
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